So you found an engagement ring in your boyfriend’s sock drawer. First of all, let’s both jump up and down for 30 seconds. No? Just me? Ok, moving on.
Finding an engagement ring is probably the best ruined surprise you can ever hope for. Unless, of course, you haven’t been dating that long, discussed marriage, or really gotten that serious. But if that’s the case, why are you pawing through his sock drawer? If you’ve found that special small box by accident, it could mean a proposal is imminent. Or not.
One of the biggest reasons people freak out about finding out The Ring is already in his possession is that it starts a countdown clock. Except you don’t know when the buzzer will go off. Your only recourse is to obsess over your iCal for every semi-significant date or proposal opportunity in the upcoming weeks and months. Could it be your birthday? His? St. Patrick’s Day? You did meet while shooting ill-advised Irish Car Bombs.
Or maybe he’s saving it for that big vacation you’ve been planning in two months? Can he really expect you to wait two months?! Wait you shall, because the bad news is, it still might not be then. He could have something entirely different up his sleeve. He could have gotten a great deal on an engagement ring but has always planned on proposing to you on your annual ski trip…that you just got back from last month. The bottom line is, it’s still just his proposal, not yours. It won’t become yours until he’s down on one knee.
From here until he actually executes his perfect plan for popping the question, you’re caught in a giddy limbo. All you can do is ensure your nails are always on point, maybe add a few more pins to your secret wedding board on Pinterest, and twiddle your well-manicured thumbs until then.
What you shouldn’t do is tell him you found it. Or anyone else, for that matter. You don’t know who he’s already told, and if it won’t be a complete surprise for you, it can at least be one for your nearest and dearest. But try not to think of it as a total failure. You might know it’s coming now, but haven’t you already suspected for a while? Didn’t you figure it out when you caught him watching you watch the sun set? Or the first time you called him with big news before you called your Mom? Or when your chats about the future started stretching years instead of months? Come on, you smart cookie – you figured this out some time ago. Now you just know he actually listened all those times you raved about cushion cut solitaires.
So zip your lips, and try to be as patient as possible. You don’t know when, or how, but you can definitely start practicing telling him “YES!” And when you do for the real deal, I promise it will be better than you’re imagining now.