Tacky Engagement Rings – Time to Chat.
We’re going to take a break from Tacori Tuesday. Trust me, there will be plenty of Tacori features in the future, but I think I’ll make them less frequent. Of course, if you follow me on Instagram you’ll see #TacoriTuesday live and in action every week.
Today I want to talk about tacky engagement rings. And no, this is not another diatribe against Gretchen Rossi’s monstrosity of a fancy yellow halo. It’s about the phrase “tacky engagement rings” itself. What defines a tacky engagement ring? Is it a too-huge center diamond? What passes the test for “huge?” 3 carats? 9 carats? Is a ring tacky if it uses several smaller diamonds to create visual presence on your hand, like a mosaic style engagement ring or 4 small princess cut diamonds grouped together to create the look of one larger princess cut diamond?
Perhaps it’s yellow gold engagement rings or halo styles that set off your tacky engagement ring alarm bells. Maybe for you tackiness is a matter of origin, not style – is a ring tacky if he went to…um, Jacob? Or is it tacky if it’s an estate (pre-owned) engagement ring? And from there does the label of tackiness apply equally to both subcategories of pre-owned: passed down from Nana or re-gifted from a jilted ex-fiancee’s finger? Don’t answer that last one – I think I already know your answer.
The point I’m making is that if beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so too then, is tackiness.
Lady Gaga’s heart shaped diamond engagement ring, for instance, is 1000% not my cup of tea. And I adore fancy yellow diamonds – ADORE – but Iggy Azalea’s ring passed into my own Tacky Engagement Rings Zone. Considering both of those engagements have ended now maybe I’m onto something. My future career as a Marriage Probability Soothsayer (based entirely on my preference for your engagement ring) aside, some women loved those rings. Including the women who said “Yes” to Taylor Kinney and Nick Young, respectively. You might call it tacky, but to one woman that same ring was perfection.
Moreover, engagement ring tackiness correlates very closely with the recipient’s bank account balance. Like, if I post a 6 carat round brilliant diamond on Facebook, most of the comments are going to be the drool emoji, obv. But inevitably, there will be some tacky engagement ring police there, posting in all caps that they’d never wear something so gaudy. Well 6 carats might seem huge in some circles but let me tell you, if you walk into the Everglades Club wearing anything less than a 4 carat rock you’re likely to be mistaken for hired help. Just look at the Real Housewives! Their carat weight is half their personalities.
On the flip side, a modest engagement ring to them is enormo to us normal folks (yes, even though I get to play dress up with 12 carat internally flawless radiant cuts, I still consider myself part of the diamond laity.) And my definition of modest is different from yours, which is different from hers, etc. etc.
Tacky engagement rings encompass a huge swath of engagement ring styles, sizes, and even specifications (like hi, I think a super-included but otherwise big and well-colored diamond is atrocious.) And you never know whose engagement ring selfie will elicit “Ugh that’s so tacky” from whose Bachelorette watch party attendees. There are engagement ring styles for every bride, and for each of those “perfect fits” there are 5 styles that she’d never deign to wear without gagging. So tacky engagement rings are a manner of opinion, obviously.
And if you’re looking for a Buzzfeed style rundown of the 22 tackiest engagement rings of all time, sorry to say this ain’t it. Trust me – I can certainly picture 22 that I personally find tacky, but the brides who wear them love them. And as long as I don’t have to do either, then all is right with the world.